The problem is, half the time my brush goes missing. Someone loses their brush and goes to my bathroom and swipes mine.
So I went to the dollar store and bought twenty brushes in several varieties. I gave a couple to each girl and told them to see me if they needed another one, but to PLEASE LEAVE MY BRUSH ALONE!
It took about two months, but eventually all twenty brushes were lost, stolen, left at school, accidentally dropped into the trash, or whatever else happens to girl's brushes. Now a girl who is late for school and whose hair is a mess will always choose he hair over her father's wishes.
They took my damn brush again.
I sat down in my chair and thought about this for awhile and came up with several options:

• I could make this a war. I could punish the hell out of them until they would be more afraid of me than of going to school with bad hair. But that would be a helluva war, and I don't want to do that. Fathers must pick their battles. I'll save my mojo for more important issues, thank you.
  
• I could go back to the dollar store and just buy more brushes. This idea actually intrigues me. I'm a firm believer in the law of the conservation of matter. These brushes are somewhere, many of them probably in our house. I wonder how many brushes I'd have to buy before we would have so many of them in our house that you would see one no matter where you looked. I mean, if I had 100,000 brushes in the house, surely no one would take mine, right?But that would cost a lot of money and take a long time. Our dollar store only stocks about 50 at a time.
  
• Then I thought of a third option. Why not just hide my brush? I could hide my brush somewhere and not tell anyone where it is. So I hid it in a suitcase I keep in the bottom of my closet. Perfect.

Now I hear the piteous wails of girls trying to find brushes in the morning, but I just smile and keep watching "Good Morning America."
Let them suffer. They're not getting my brush!